Thursday, November 12, 2009

The "F" Factor

Now no naughty thoughts there…I am merely referring to the other great “F” factor called FORCE!

I always hated physics! I could not differentiate one theorem from another and I take this opportunity to confess that the night before the Physics boards, I sat reading Harry Potter cleverly hidden between my big, fat history test book! (So sue me now!)

At 3am last morning, revelation struck me! My mother was in some way related to Sir Newton…Do not doubt me, I have the name right…SIR ISSAC NEWTON! That is when I started an extensive research. And lo and behold! I found that both my mum and Sir Newton thought on exactly the same lines! Of course the context is completely different, but the rationale behind the thought is the very same! You would be astounded at my findings!

All you physics buffs out there would word for word know the 3 laws of motion as proposed by Sir. Newton, for those who like me tend to think about apple pit when an apple falls on the head, these are the three laws:

POINT OF COMPARISON :1

Newton’s First Law of motion

An object at rest will remain at rest unless acted on by an unbalanced force. An object in motion continues in motion with the same speed and in the same direction unless acted upon by an unbalanced force.
“This means that there is a natural tendency of objects to keep on doing what they're doing. All objects resist changes in their state of motion. In the absence of an unbalanced force, an object in motion will maintain this state of motion.”

(This is what my mum feels about my life. She feels that I live a dreary life, monotonous and a complete drag and did I mention monotonous?)

Mum’s first law of marriage:

“A person will continue in his/her dreary life unless acted upon by a force completely into making him/her get married. If this force is not applied, the person is mostly likely set to die a bachelor/spinster (which parents just cannot deal with EVER!)”

POINT OF COMPARISON :2

Newton’s Second Law of motion

Acceleration is produced when a force acts on a mass. The greater the mass (of the object being accelerated) the greater the amount of force needed (to accelerate the object).
Everyone unconsciously knows the Second Law. Everyone knows that heavier objects require more force to move the same distance as lighter objects

(My mum knows that she requires a lot more force to get me to meet proposals and talk to guys and stuff. Her negotiation and conviction skills have evolved drastically over time! So the greater the wall I put up against marriage, the harder she pushes!)

Mum’s second law of marriage:

“Desired results are produced when force of conviction and negotiation acts on a person. The greater the resistance, the harder the parents should force, convince and negotiate!”

POINT OF COMPARISON: 3

For every action there is an equal and opposite re-action.
“This means that for every force there is a reaction force that is equal in size, but opposite in direction. That is to say that whenever an object pushes another object it gets pushed back in the opposite direction equally hard.”

(My mum is relentless with proposals. She throws a dozen at me every 2 hours! I wonder where she gets this gargantuan mass of “splendid, amazing matches” from!
Perhaps this is the defining similarity between Sir Newton and my mum…no matter how much we push back she pushes even more!)

Mum’s third law of marriage:

“Every NO to a proposal demands a barrage of proposal matching that NO decibel for decibel and intensity for intensity”

Trust me…just ask any person hounded by proposals…I’m sure they would have these marriage laws by heart…how do you think some people have stayed single and blissful for so long?

3 comments:

  1. buahahaha... omg... this was too funny!!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. This was well written. Kudos to you.Besides the excellence in vocabulary, the message is very very clear and point made. Keep up the good work. This is also a motivation for your mum to go from strength to strength

    ReplyDelete
  3. hey teenu ... awesome yaar.. funny too... being a physics student it s damnnnn funnny in all aspects...

    ReplyDelete